Tuesday, January 1, 2013
New Years Resolution
I hate to say this but good riddance to 2012. We were sorely tried financially, emotionally, and physically right up to the last day of December. Not that some good things didn't happen such as the birth of our grand daughter, though that was amidst strife too. Not that we didn't learn tremendously, often what not to do. But over all, I'm ready to start anew.
I'm especially ready to slam the door on last year as another big blow came yesterday morning when we found my mare dead. She was in the prime of her life for age and looked the picture of health with her shiny, silky coat. The ground was not disturbed anywhere in her pen, a hint that she might have had colic. There was nothing to tell us what happened. For all we know she could have had an aneurysm or a heart attack.
We do know it must of been quick because the loose dirt around her body showed she simply laid down. This was totally unexpected as the night before a horse whisperer friend of mine and I had just looked her over at chore time and all was well.
That makes the body count three, if you don't count the chicken the raccoon ate. Jasmine, the yak, died of EHD which is caused by a midge fly bite.
Chicory, the matron of our dairy goat herd, appeared to have a type of cancer, and now my mare, Bess. All I can say is, "The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh, praise be the name of the Lord." He must have something in mind for us, even if it is to simply refine our hearts. I'm just glad my name isn't Job. Now that man was tried unmercifully but having endured well, he was richly blessed.
Some of our trials last year that will spill over into this year are of our own making. We didn't establish balance in all things. We allowed the howling winds to buffet us off our foundation.
We will right that for I firmly believe that when "The going gets tough, the tough get going." I'm going to put my work boots and gloves on and take charge of my world. Last year we reacted to events. We allowed ourselves to be pulled down as we rushed to aid or fix this and fix that, depleting our resources.
We won't quit serving. It is an intrical part of our lives and makes us a better, more Christ like person. But - the pure love of Christ is charity. It is beyond love. It is doing what is best, not just doing good things. Doing good things sometimes enables evil to remain, therefore impedes growth. Think - feed a fish and feed a boy for the day making him dependent on you for life or teach him to fish and allow him to feed himself forever.
Doing the best thing is doing that which will bring about the greatest growth in yourself and others. Sometimes that is stepping back and not relieving suffering that other might learn, sometimes it is pitching in when it is most difficult for you, and sometimes it is resting from your labors, building reserves.
Determining what is Good and what is Best takes wisdom. We gained a bit of that last year. Much was about when to step in and when to hang back. Watching suffering and not relieving it is often the most difficult thing to do when all instincts scream GO HELP.
"My house is a house of order." says the Lord and that is where we are going to start this year. We are going to establish order putting ourselves on a firmer foundation.
I've begun to evaluate our finances, putting in place plans that, in the destructive winds of last year, were abandoned leaving us on a rocky cliff. We need to tread carefully. We are blessed to know what will put us on a surer foundation and I will share with you these tried and true formulas. The ones I abandoned as we rushed about.
I've got to return to making up menus so that we will eat better and use our food storage from the garden and livestock more efficiently.
I need to restore an avid devotion to the scriptures and call upon the Lord more humbly.
If I want 2013 to be a better year then I've got to put my car in gear. You did know that the Lord can't steer a parked car didn't you? I know not to wait for direction before making a move. I've got to ease out onto life's highway, establish a house of order, build a firm foundation that when the winds buffet, and guaranteed they will, Kirk and I won't be swept from our foundations. Then as we move forth, the Lord will whisper guidance, " Keep going." or "Turn back."
It is those sweet whisperings that give me peace in a turbulent world.