Sunday, November 24, 2013

Soap, Fruit Fly Trick, and Going Crazy

I'm going insane and my body is done in. This house hunting and house fix up projects, has me in such a panicked dither. My adrenals crashed today and my temperature plummeted to 92.8 F.  I can't get my body to sleep more than six hours a night and with 2 and 1/2 months of doing this it has taken a toll. My body said NO MORE. I'm a bit foggy brained, a bit woozy, and a bit weak in the legs and though I don't feel too bad sitting, standing is another thing. I've been on pain killers last night and today, something I rarely take. When the adrenals crash you go into body aches from the top of your head to the soles of your feet and your lower back and back of knees scream. The pain didn't ease until midnight last night and still I was up wide awake at 3 this morning.

It has been a rest day because I dare not do much of anything else as rising starts the symptoms all over again. Of course there is a lovely loaf of bread in the oven and an Italian soup in the crock pot. You know I can't simply do nothing. I did whip up a cake from a box and put it in the oven with the bread. OOPS, the oven was at 400 for the bread and that is 50F degrees too high. A sure symptom the brain is not functioning. That and my husband doesn't believe a word I say because it is all garbled. Oh well, this too shall pass.

I just hope the Lord has plans for this all to end soon. I don't want to do Thanksgiving or Christmas. I just want to move as in move out, move on and settle down. I'm forcing myself to decorate as it will be expected when the house goes on the market which I hope is in the next two to three weeks. Kirk is home working on the bathroom and I am hauling load after load out to the semi-trailer to make the house look less cluttered and more roomy. I've hated that old semi-trailer but it has had its use lately. It too will be sold.

We are waiting on a phone call to go and see one more place but we think we have what we want -- more or less. Nothing is a perfect fit but this place had more of our wants and needs than any other.

Try looking for five months for a new place to live and see just how much you learn about yourself and what is really important to you. We keep thinking that if we didn't have so many hobbies, animals which ties into a desire for a more self-sufficient lifestyle then this all would be simple. We could then look at a large number of houses in town or very small acreages just out of town in our price range and voila, we'd have a place to live in no time.

But no, we want a shop area for Kirk, an office, a craft area for me, ( so the sewing machines could quit getting drug around, the knitting machine would have a home and a loom could be set up. Mine now is for sale. That is when I can get photos of it for I want a much smaller one.), we need livestock facilities, and a mud room. And last but not least some land. Each place has been this but not that, and that but not this and we keep trying to figure in if we can afford to build what they don't have or just do without. Add into the equation that we are getting older and this new place is to be our last move until the grave or nursing home.

At first I thought I wanted lots of land but then we've begun to think of all the work that would mean in our older years. Then we saw places with land but the house didn't have enough room or we'd have to do lots of remodeling to it and build a shop.

Then there was the place with the dreamy shop and hardly a house at all. Not even fit to add on to. Oh and the prices, well if we had 100,000 more in our top top squeak by budget range then we could have it all but that isn't the case. So we are checking out a place that has most of the things on our list but can we make the payments. We are looking at retirement in 10 years and we want it paid off. That leads to the panic of getting enough for this house to take a huge chunk out of the new place's cost.

That leads us to thinking of just how self-sufficient can we be immediately on each place to save money and how can we bring in extra incomes from the property boundaries to hurry the pay off time. At first we thought of the land providing the extra income but our thoughts are moving now more toward my sewing and Kirk's knives as being the extra income.

I am finding out that being able to have a place for everything and everything in its place is paramount for me.  I can't handle having things in four locations anymore. Winter coats, hats, glove, boots, etc. in four places, and the same goes for most of our other belongings. It is one of reasons we are moving, to try and relive my highly stressed out feelings all the time. I need a controlled environment as the world around me throws its curve balls. The two A's in my life, Autism and Addison's disease are taking a pounding on my mental and physical health in our present situation.   

Yet after all the thought and work of searching we don't want the decision to be ours. We want to do as the Lord would have us do. Where ever he wants us is always the best place. He knows our future needs. He knows just how bad things will get in the USA before it has been put to rights once more. How bad it will get around the world before a balance has been reached.

And while we work on a future, the present screams take care of me. I'm really low on vanilla. I should have whipped up a batch the beginning of October but I was just hanging on with the kids staying here for three weeks and all this mess. I made the vanilla tonight, just 1 cup of vodka, and three vanilla beans cut in half and split open placed in a pint jar. I did this just before I filled supper plates and decided I was breathing so hard I needed a rest. Ridiculous I know. 

I was going to mix up some laundry soap and dish soap but I ran out of steam after supper and after my rest because I then hauled two pinly loads of wood for the fire while hubby hauled in coal. Priorities you know, warmth before cleanliness. Luckily I shredded a bunch of soap bars the other day so that stage of the process is done for numerous batches to come. I used old handmade soap, all I've got is old soap. The advantage is since the moisture has long gone it is much dryer making it shred into a powder. That melts very nicely. I hope to make my dish and laundry soap in the morning before we leave, if we leave to look at another house, I haven't heard from the realtor yet. I'll add more washing soda to the formula for the clothes soap this time to see if the whites are whiter this way.

I don't think I told you but the smell did come out of my towels, the smell that was always there with the store detergents that were no perfume or dyes formulas. It just took a few washings to get it all out. I now know why the perfumes in soaps is so important to the commercial companies. They are trying to hide the fact their products just don't work well. I also forgot to tell you but the kids left a pretty good ring around the tub the other day when all four girls stayed for the weekend and I tried Dawn dish soap which I usually use to clean the bathroom. I'm not thrilled with it as it has too many soap bubbles and takes some doing to get all of them down the drain in the tub. Then I tried shampoo because years ago my mom said that worked great - nope. Then I decided to try my laundry soap. Worked like a charm so I'm making a double batch this time so I have some to clean the bathrooms. I'm beginning to really like this homemade stuff.

I just have to get my life together so I can keep up with making it all. It may save money but it doesn't save time. One other thing I forgot to tell you. I had lots and lots of fruit flies around the house. I knew they came from the bananas and I'd looked up traps but I finally swatted enough of them that they are almost all gone. Meanwhile my Bountiful Basket deliveries keep sending bananas. I didn't want people looking at the house wondering if they had entered the jungle. Yes, to the Internet once more I went. I learned that if I rub each banana vigorously and thoroughly with my hands while holding it under water I rub away the eggs and such and I don't get fruit flies anymore. No soap is needed just a scrub job. Three batches of bananas later and I can safely report that it works like a charm.

Well, since it was a really rough night before 12 pm and a 3 oclock morning, I'm headed off to bed. I've got to make soap in the morning before we go look at another house. That is if the realtor calls. Nighty, night. 

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